


You're good at being bad, you're bad at being good

by bearer_of_light



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Fluff, Rated M for future, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-02
Updated: 2017-07-10
Packaged: 2018-09-06 02:18:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8730946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bearer_of_light/pseuds/bearer_of_light
Summary: Lexa meets Clarke and they have a lot of fun.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for no reason at all. It will be a happy little thing.
> 
> Title is from Frank Ocean's Pink matter.

It was 5.30 am when her alarm went off.

That awful sound filled the room every day at the same time. Loud and obnoxious and awful. Just awful (still not awful enough to make her get up). Every night, before going to bed, she would place a clock on the other side of the room. That way she had to get up and remove herself from the coziness of the bed, walk to the other side and turn it off (sometimes she wouldn't). That's something she forced herself to do since her high school days when the only thing she dreaded more than going to school was getting up to go to school.

She hates it but it helps (sometimes). Nothing else matters.

So yes, the alarm rings every day. Except on weekends. Weekends are free. Weekends mean no alarm, no timetable. Tiny piece of heaven she gets to have every 5 days. She can spend those 48 hours in bed or she can be on the street before the sun.

But this day wasn't the weekend. It was Friday and she had to get up, walk 10 feet and turn the damn thing off. She usually gets up after four rings. She turns it off before the fifth. It takes one to wake her up and three more to convince her about the urgency of getting up.

There are times when it takes more than four and times when she is wide awake by the time it starts to ring and there are times when she just lets it ring out because she is too tired to move.

It never rings more than eight times. If she's not up by then, she won't get up.

That day was manageable. Alarm was turned off and she was headed to the bathroom.

Morning routine was always the same. She liked routines.

First she took a shower. Usually a cold one to make her blood run faster, shaking off the remains of her sleepy time (on weekends it's warm; those are after all the days when there is no musts and have tos). Then it's teeth brushing time. There's a mirror above the sink where every day she is faced with a different person. The shell is always pretty much the same, but not the person. Today she liked what she saw. Her hair was a messy bundle of wild brownness and her eyes green and light. It could be a good day.

It took her fifteen minutes to be done with the bathroom and next on the list was coffee. That first cup is the vital point of the day. It could all go downhill from there. Coffee helped her survive lonely days, loud days, silent days and just days. It was there when she needed distraction, when she needed to avoid people and when she needed people, when she just wanted to sit and observe. And most importantly it was there at 6 am when she needed it the most.

She never does much over that first cup. Mornings always make her brain run really slow so she dumbs it down. She spends her time looking through the window, drinking that coffee and becoming more human with each sip.

It was May and the sun was up early. It shed a light on the city in the distance, hiding behind tall buildings and skyscrapers. Her apartment was on the third floor and the street beneath her window was still sleeping.

After the first cup is finished, she made herself another one and opened her laptop. Her inbox was almost empty and she was almost happy. There were a couple of messages, nothing urgent or important so she pretended there was nothing at all.

She opened her social media accounts and skimmed through. Nothing interesting there either. Couple of people were already up and not very happy about it. Most of the talk was about the last night's episode of that TV show everyone watched. Lexa fell asleep before it began so she closed her laptop before getting spoiled. She wasn't that big of a fan but she looked forward to that hour when nothing was important and she could pretend the Earth stopped spinning.

She put the laptop in her bag along with the stuff she would need later; a couple of notebooks, pens and books she needed to write a paper due tomorrow morning (she never understood the point of deadlines set for Friday nights).

Clock said it was 6.30 am which meant she had to leave soon.

Jeans and green shirt were her clothes of choice. They were comfortable and comfort is the one things she cherished above all.

\- Okay. Here we go.

At 6.45 am she put in her earbuds, turned on the music on her phone and closed the door of her apartment. She made sure that by the time her feet hit the street she had music blasting in her ears. Much needed distraction.

Walking on that street she always saw the same people.

The old lady, living across the street, walking her dog. Couple of kids waiting for the school bus. Old man sitting on the bench across the street.

They were all familiar. She knew them, but she didn't really know them.

Down the street there was a small coffee shop. There was a man bringing out the tables and chairs every morning as she walked by. She's never been in but always said good morning.

\- Good morning.

\- Good morning young lady. – He responded with a smile on his face.

She was about to walk past him when she saw his mouth moving so she stopped, turned around and took out the earbuds.

\- Sorry, did you say something to me? I had music on so I didn't hear you.

\- That's alright. I said you are the only person that has ever said good morning to me. I mean other than the customers.

She blushed. This short, round friendly looking  man caught her off guard.

\- I see you leave that building every morning so I guess you live there. I'm the owner of this thing behind my back and if you ever want a decent cup of coffee you are welcome to come inside. My treat.

\- Thank you. That's really nice of you, but it's not necessary.

\- I know, but you make my mornings a little bit better so it's the least I can do. I'm here every day most of the day so stop any time.

\- Thank you. It's really nice of you. Maybe one day.

\- Whenever you want. – he said smiling. – Alright, I'll leave you now. Have a good day.

\- Thank you and you too.

Lexa put the earbuds back in and walked away.

The short conversation took her by surprise. She didn't expect it. She never does. She moved here 4 years ago when she started college and she never engaged in any type of neighbourly chats with anyone. They were all strangers. That man was a stranger. But he was there everyday and she passed him everyday and at one point she just started to say good mornings as she passed by. Routine.

She's never been to the coffee shop but she made a mental note to find some time over the weekend.

She was a block away from the campus when her phone buzzed. She took it out from her pocket and saw there was a new message.

**OCTAVIA  
** hey, where you at?

Octavia was one of the few friends she had. Probably the only real one. They met on the first day of college. Lexa was waiting in line to sign up for her classes when this girl with braids in her hair came and tapped her on the shoulder. She asked if Lexa knew where music department was. Lexa took out her map of the campus and tried to explain to the girl where was she supposed to go but with little success. She asked the girl to wait with her and after she's done, Lexa would go with her and show her.

Waiting in that line, Lexa learned a lot about Octavia. She was born in London, her mother was British and her father from Egypt. She had a brother and she was there to study music theory and play piano. Later that day Octavia bought them coffee, as a token of gratitude. Coffee that day led to the on next day and 4 years later the two of them were friends.

**LEXA  
** Just around the corner. I'll be there in five.

**OCTAVIA  
** hurry up, im hungry.

Lexa really like routines. Her Octavia routine was getting breakfast before class. That's why she would get up so early every day. That became a thing one week after they met. They had one class together, the earliest one, and Octavia was always hungry. One of those days, Lexa suggested and Octavia agreed to sacrifice a bit of their sleep to eat something at the bakery on the campus. So now every morning, at 7.15 am, they would meet and have breakfast together.

\- You are late. You are never late. I thought someone killed you.

Lexa looked at her phone. It was 7.17

\- Don't be so dramatic, it's only been 2 minutes.

\- Yeah, and this is the first time in 4 years that you are late. What happened? You gazed through the window a bit too long?

\- No, very funny, I got held up by someone. - Lexa said as they started to walk toward the bakery. It was only couple of minutes away. Campus was still empty, only few wandering students around. They always went to the same bakery. Lexa always ordered the same thing.

\- Oooh, with who? A pretty girl?

\- No. A guy I see every morning. He owns a coffee shop not far from my apartment. He invited me to come someday.

\- Yuck.

Lexa chuckled.

\- Not like that. I say good morning to him every morning.

\- That's very you. Let me guess, you won't go?

\- Why would you think that?

\- Because you never go anywhere except when I make you.

\- You are wrong. I go to a lot of places.

\- Name one.

Truth is she didn't go out much. Most of the day she would spend on the campus. Studying or reading and when she got home she would be to tired and prefered to spend her night in front of the TV. She only went for walks or to the park.

\- Park.

Octavia laughed and opened the doors of the bakery. The bell above them rang loud. There was no one inside.  

\- That really doesn't count.

\- Why?

\- Because there are no people at the park.

\- There are plenty of people there.

They ordered their things. Lexa a croissant and a cup of coffee. Octavia bagel and tea. They sat at the table by the window, looking to the west side of the campus.

\- C'mon Lex you know what I mean.

\- Yeah, well, I decided I'll accept his offer and go and see what it's like.

\- You need company?

Even though Octavia teased Lexa about her ever so often avoidance of human contact, she also understood that Lexa prefered to be around familiar people.

\- No, I'll be okay. But thanks.

They spend the rest of their breakfast in silence, Octavia on her phone and Lexa answering those e-mails. There was one from her mother. She wanted to know if Lexa would be coming home anytime soon. It's been a couple of months since her last trip home. She liked the idea but she wasn't very fond of really going through with it and going home. Home. It was a construct that stop being what it meant a long time ago. Home was far away.

By the time they got up and were ready to leave, the bakery was already full of people. Outside was the same.

\- Lunch at 1?

\- Yes.

They hugged and went separate ways.

It took Lexa 4 weeks to get comfortable with the hugging. It's not like she didn't like it. She did. A lot. But there was never such thing in her family. Growing up she was hugged only on special occasions. They were never big on affection thing which meant she never really got used to other people's arms around her neck.

First time a girl hugged her was equally great and awkward experience.  She was 14.

She liked a girl and girl liked her back. Her name was Costia and she was always so gentle and careful. They almost always talked and almost never touched.  Except on bad days. On bad days they would lay on bed and hold hands.

One of those days Costia leaned and whispered to Lexa's ear.

- _I wanna kiss you._

Lexa's face turned to 100 different shades of red. She turned her head to Costia and saw her smiling. She felt her hands on her face and she closed her eyes. Costia's lips were softer than anything Lexa ever encountered. It was first time she had another person that close. It was first time she kissed someone. Costia trailed soft kisses along her upper and lower lip. Lexa never wanted to stop kissing Costia.

Eventually they had to stop and Lexa was struggling to breathe. But for the first time in her life it was a sweet struggle.

- _You are so weird. –_ Costia smiled and pulled her into a hug.

After a few seconds of not knowing what to do Lexa hugged her with no intention of letting go.

So yes, it took her a while to get comfortable with Octavia being a hugger but she liked it.

Lexa's first class was at 9 and it was 8.45 when she said goodbye to Octavia. She was the first to come to the classroom. She liked college. She liked studying. She was on her way to become an astrophysicist. When she was younger there was no better relief than to look up and see a sky full of stars. Everything seemed possible and within reach. She could be anyone and anywhere. If she could only reach so far.

She was a good student, not the best, but good enough to be considered one of the better. Growing up she was always one of the best. Other kids loved her. Teachers loved her. People in general loved her. That was the way it has always been. And she liked them.

Her only problem with people was  that they talked too much and often didn't understand why she didn't like to talk all the time. Octavia was one of the people who understood that silence didn't have to be uncomfortable.

Halfway through her other class, around 11.30 her phone buzzed in her pocket. Lexa knew it was probably Octavia being bored in her class. She waited till 11.45 when the short break started.

**OCTAVIA  
** yo, you don't mind if i bring someone with me to lunch

**OCTAVIA  
** she's new

**OCTAVIA  
** i just met her

**OCTAVIA  
** she transferred from ucla

**OCTAVIA  
** she's cute

**LEXA  
** Okay.

 

It took only few seconds before Octavia answered.

**OCTAVIA  
** excited as always

**OCTAVIA  
** see you soon

**LEXA  
** See you.

 

When the class finished she rushed to the cafeteria to get her sandwich. Usually she made lunch the day before and brought it with her, but last night she fell asleep before she could make it, so today she was forced to eat some garbage cafeteria liked to call meal.

She managed to come there while the line was still small. She took the first sandwich she saw and went to see Octavia. They always had lunch at the east side of the campus. It has a bunch of trees, a table and two benches. Lexa knew Octavia had other friends she could spend her free time with but was grateful for these little things they did together.

When Lexa arrived, Octavia and the other girl were already there.

\- Late again. What's going on with you? – Octavia asked with a grin on her face. She was enjoying herself.

\- I forgot my lunch.

Lexa put her bag on the table and for the first time looked at the girl sitting next to Octavia. Her hair was blonde and fell on her shoulders.  She was eating some kind of salad. She had the bluest eyes Lexa has ever seen and she was smiling at her. Lexa could handle a pretty girly, but this one was really pretty.  Lexa looked down and sat on the bench across of them.

\- Well well, I should mark this day. Not only were you late 2 times in one day, but you also forgot your lunch.

Lexa unpacked her sandwich and took a bite, everything to avoid the blue eyed girl.

\- It happens.

Octavia laughed.

\- Yes but not to you. Fuck, I'm rude. Lexa this is Clarke. Clarke this is Lexa.

Lexa could feel Octavia's devilish grin as she was forced to look up. She saw a hand stretched over the table, but her brain did not register it because Clarke had boobs.  Clarke had boobs and it was a sunny may day and Lexa forgot how to breathe.

\- Nice to meet you Lexa.

Clarke's voice reminded her she was supposed to look up. She tried to smile and quickly took the hand hanging in front of her face in the most awkward handshake of her life.

\- Nice to meet you too. – she offered with a faint smile.

Lexa could feel her cheeks burning red because this Clarke girl was still holding her hand and smiling. Her eyes really were the prettiest blue Lexa has ever seen. Like the line where the ocean meets sky just more beautiful.

\- Okay, that was not as weird as I thought it would be, good job Lexa.

Octavia's voice brought her back to Earth.

\- C'mon now it was great, I expected much worse. - Clarke said.

Every time Clarke spoke all that Lexa could think about was how good she would sound under her. Her face flushed at the thought.

\- Weirdo, I haven't said anything bad about you, don't give me the silent treatment.

\- I'm not giving you any kind of treatment.

\- Mhmm, anyhow, Clarke here was just telling me her laptop broke and she needs to fix it but doesn't know anyone and has no money. I told her you'd be happy to look at it.

And yet again she felt the look Octavia was giving her and she knew where it all was going.

Ever since they became friends Octavia has made it her mission to find Lexa a girlfriend, or at least someone who can play pretend for some time. Her attempts weren't always that bad because Lexa had nothing against sex and the girls were mostly aware that it would be nothing more than a two or three time thing. Lexa wasn't interested in girlfriends.

\- And I was just telling Octavia that I can't ask that from a person I just met.

\- Why not? - Lexa asked.

Clarke was hot and Clarke smiled and Lexa couldn't stop looking. There's nothing bad in wanting to look some more.

\- Because you are probably busy and I don't want to be a burden.

\- I'd be more than happy to help you if you want.

Clarke was nice and she didn't want to be rude. Or at least that's the excuse she was going to say to Octavia when she teases her later.

\- I do need it but if it is too much of a problem I can wait and save some money, really.

\- Nonsense, Lexa will fix it. Isn't that right Lexa?

Lexa shot a glare in Octavia's direction before answering.

\- Yes, I can look at it.

\- Okay, thank you.

\- You can thank me if I fix it.

Clarke laughed and Lexa wanted more.

\- Okay, then you give me your number or I can give you mine so we can arrange when and where we can meet.

\- Damn girl, you are fast, it took me 5 days to get her number.

\- I mean, we can do it now, we don't have to exchange the phone numbers if you don't want.

Octavia was now laughing out loud.

\- It's okay, I don't mind it.

Clarke handed Lexa her phone and Lexa gave her a confused look.

\- So you can write your number. - she responded.

\- Oh, right.

It was embarrassment on embarrassment. Lexa fumbled with the blonde girl's phone, saved the number and handed the phone back. Moments later her own phone buzzed.

\- That would be me - Clarke said - so you can have mine.

\- Okay, this was fun, but now Clarke and I have to go, we have a coffee date with Finn and the guys. I would invite you but I know better.

\- It was nice meeting you Lexa.

\- It was nice to meet you too.

\- Okay weirdo, you have something else to do today?

\- Not really, I'll be in the library and then go home.

\- Exciting as always. Okay then. Take care.

\- You too.

They hugged and Lexa was left sitting on the bench watching them leave. She couldn't help but stare because Clarke was all curves. As Lexa watched her walk away she could think of at least 3 unholy things she wanted to do to her.

She shook her head and finished the sandwich.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things escalate and Lexa likes it.

When Lexa looked at her phone it was already 5pm. She's been in the library for the past 3 hours. That's how long it took her to finish her paper. She spent most of the time trying to concentrate and get Clarke out of her head.  But all she could think about was the sight of Clarke walking away. She was objectifying and Lexa was never objectifying.  Almost never.

She hated it but she couldn't help but think how those pants fit the blonde perfectly and how nice that low cut shirt she was wearing was. Clarke was hot. Very hot.

So after nearly 3 hours of writing she allowed her mind to wander again. It goes without saying that the light tapping on her shoulder startled her.

\- I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you.

It was Clarke.

\- I saw you sitting here and I was just leaving and I didn't know if I should come and say hello or just leave but it felt wrong so I just came to say hi. I'm sorry if I scared you.

Clarke was speaking as fast as Lexa's heart was beating.

\- No, no, don't worry, everything is okay, I just didn't expect it. You didn't scare me, don't worry. I thought you were with Octavia?

\- Yeah I was, but those dudes are annoying so I left and came here to sketch. I saw you when I came but I didn't want to disturb you. You are studying?

If by studying Clarke meant remembering all the curves and edges of her body then yes, Lexa was studying.

\- Yes, I mean no, I was finishing a paper. Took me a while.

\- I'm sorry about that, but from what Octavia told me about you I'm sure you'll be fine. – Clarke said with a smile and Lexa realised she was staring. Again. She quickly looked away and started to collect her books.

\- And I'm sorry for whatever else she told you about me.

\- Don't worry, nothing bad.

Clarke was still smiling and Lexa knew nothing could save her.

\- Where do you live? – a question that made Lexa look up, her cheeks burning and her brain going to all the wrong places. She really needed a cold shower.

\- That came out wrong. – Clarke laughed. - Let me try again. I see you are also leaving so I thought maybe we are going in the same direction.

\- Down at Polis.

\- You are fucking me? Fuck, I'm sorry. Shit. Sorry again. – Clarke mumbled biting her lip.

\- It's all right. But I do live there.

Lexa could feel her whole body burning so she looked away from Clarke's eyes to her mouth. But Clarke still had her teeth around her lower lip so Lexa looked down to Clarke's neck which was another mistake so her eyes went lower. She caught herself following the edge of Clarke's shirt, starting at her collarbone and stopping before it was too late. When she looked back at Clarke's face she saw an amused look and a hint of a smile.

Lexa couldn't remember what they were talking about.

\- That's amazing because I just moved there.

Lexa's mind was going crazy. She couldn't believe what her life was becoming. She had a pretty blonde in front of her, one that seemed interested and one that lived in the same street as she did.

\- Wow, that's really amazing. Where do you live? – she asked.

\- 18, that big red building.

\- I'm at 20.

\- I can't believe this.

\- Yeah. Octavia will have a field trip with this. God, she'll never let me live.

Lexa instantly looked down, fumbling with her bag. She did not mean to say that out loud.

\- And, why is that? – Lexa could almost hear Clarke's smile.

\- She just likes to tease me.

\- And why would she tease you about that?

Clarke was persistent.

\- Because you are a girl and pretty.  – Lexa looked up and saw Clarke smiling.

\- That is something worth teasing you about?

Lexa was already in love with her smile.

\- Now you are teasing me.

-Maybe. – Clarke winked.  - So you wanna join me on my journey home, dear neighbour?

\- Yes, sure.

They walked in silence, side by side. It wasn't uncomfortable and Lexa felt is should have been. Clarke smelled like flowers and it was all that Lexa could think off. The silence wasn't helping because soon Lexa started to think what Clarke would taste like. She needed a distraction.

\- Is art something you've always wanted to do?

Clarke looked at her smiling and Lexa couldn't remember if she ever saw Clarke not smiling.

\- Yes. At first it was a hard choice to make, but now it's cool. I like it. I'm okay at it. It's nice to do something you like every day. What are you studying?

\- Astrophysics.

\- Wow, that's so cool. I was never good at math or numbers or anything like that. Why did you chose it?

\- I like stars.

\- I know right? There's some kind of a comfort in the vastness of it all. But I'll leave the specifics to you, I'll just continue to admire them from far away.

And just like that they walked in silence again. There wasn't much left until they reach their buildings but Lexa needed words.

\- What did you sketch in the library? If you don't mind me asking.

\- Nothing in particular. I just let my hand go and don't worry about the outcome. There was a lake near our house when I was a kid. I used to spend my days there just watching  people come and go. After a while I began to bring my notebook with me and just sketch things I saw. Trees. Water. People sitting, crying, laughing. Stuff like that.

\- I do that too. Not the drawing I mean, I can't do that. But the watching part. You can learn a lot about people just by watching them.

\- Really? What did you learn about me?

Lexa turned her head away because she was blushing. Again. She was starting to think Clarke was doing it on purpose.

\- I don't know. Stuff.

They were in front of Clarke's building and Clarke was close. Closer than ever.

\- What kind of stuff?

Lexa looked up and she couldn't move or speak. Clarke was within hand's reach and Lexa wanted to reach more than anything in the world. But she couldn't move.

\- You have pretty eyes. – it was barely above whisper.

The only thing Lexa wanted to do was kiss the girl.

\- Thank you.

But the moment passed and Lexa didn't kiss the girl.

\- I should get going. I'll text you about my laptop.

\- Okay.

\- See you.

\- Bye.

Clarke turned around and went inside. Lexa once again watched her leave realizing she was falling fast and hard.

She spent the rest of the day thinking about Clarke. About those small dimples that came to life every time she smiled. Or about that spark behind the blue eyes every time she blushed. Her body. All the things she wanted to do to that body.

Lexa could feel the bees buzzing in her stomach.

Around 9 pm she got a message that put a smile on her face.

CLARKE

hey, you busy?

LEXA

Not really. Why?

CLARKE

i was thinking maybe you could come and see what's wrong with my laptop. i kinda need it over the weekend to do my homework.

  
Lexa went to full panic mode. Her phone was a fire burning with every thought she had that day.

CLARKE

you don't have to if you have something planned

LEXA

I don't. I can come. But I don't promise much.

CLARKE

great. you are the best. i'm on the 3rd floor. number 11

LEXA

I'm on my way.

Lexa looked in the mirror. She was wearing the same pants as before with a different shirt. Her hair was down and it was only a laptop, she reminded herself.

After few minutes she found herself in front of Clarke's door. She knocked and soon after she saw Clarke standing in front of her in shorts and an oversized sweater.

\- Hi, long time no see. Come in.

\- Hi, thank you.

Clarke's apartment was as big as hers. There were few boxes in different corners of the room. Lexa saw kitchen, table, couch, TV and a closed room she presumed to be bedroom. But bedrooms have beds and Lexa couldn't stop thinking about Clarke's bed. Or better yet, Clarke in bed.

\- You want something to drink?

Lexa now turned her head to look at Clarke again. Her brain was forcing her to look down and down and down, to pin Clarke against the wall and drink her up.

\- Water, if it's not a problem.

Clarke walked to kitchen and Lexa followed her. Lexa couldn't help but oggle. She was sure she was drooling.

When Clarke turned around she had a glass of water in her hand and Lexa tried her best to look up as quickly as she could. If it was to judge by the look Clarke gave her she wasn't fast enough.

Lexa needed a bucket of cold water, not just one glass.

\- So, that laptop. – Clarke said smirking.

Lexa cleared her throat before answering.

\- Yes. Where is it?

They walked over to the couch and this time Lexa was looking up.

\- It won't turn on. And don't you dare laugh at me.

Lexa took the laptop, careful not to touch Clarke's hand, or any other part of Clarke for that matter. She typed some things and let out a quiet laugh.

\- Okay, I'll fix it for you if you'll show me one of you sketches.

\- Deal.

Lexa smiled and continued to type. She could feel Clarke watching her. She could also smell her. Clarke still smelled like flowers.

\- Here you go. – Lexa said as she handed Clarke back her laptop.

\- Oh my God. You fixed it. You saved my life. Oh my God.

\- It really isn't that much. – Lexa smiled.

\- It is for me. Thank you really. You are the best.

\- You are welcome.

\- Okay, so the sketch. Don't be freaked out okay? – Clarke put the laptop on the coffee table.

\- Okay?

\- I mean... ugh, yeah I'll just show you. Wait here.

Clarke got up and went to the room with closed door. She left it open and Lexa could see the bed. She quickly looked away because she couldn't be thinking about that, not when Clarke was just a couple of feet away.

\- So yeah, don't be freaked out, please.

Clarke came back, sat next to Lexa, opened the notebook on a specific page and gave it to Lexa.

In front of Lexa's eyes was a sketch of her, sitting in the library earlier that day, writing. She didn't know what to say.

\- It's rough but you looked... cute and I wanted to draw it. Or you.

\- It's beautiful. – Lexa said tracking the outlines of the picture.

\- Thanks.

\- It looks great, you are really good.

\- Thank you. – Clarke blushed.

They spent some time like that, sitting in silence, Lexa looking at the sketch of her face and Clarke looking at Lexa.

Lexa thought about the absurdity of the situation. There she was, sitting on the couch of the most beautiful girl she ever knew, girl who did a drawing of her face, girl who was next to her smiling and smelling like flowers and doing nothing.

She wanted to touch but she couldn't move.

She wanted too much so she did nothing.

\- I should get going. – Lexa said eventually.

\- You can take it if you want. The sketch I mean.

\- Really?

\- Yes silly, really.

\- Thank you.

\- Thank you for fixing my laptop.

\- No problem.

\- I'll see you around?

\- Yes.

\- Goodnight Lexa.

\- Goodnight Clarke.

This time it was Clarke who watched Lexa leave.

  
Lexa was about to turn off her phone and go to sleep when it buzzed in her hand.

CLARKE

works like a peach. if you wanted to know. thank you again. you saved my ass

CLARKE

i hope you are not sleeping... sorry if you are

LEXA

I was just getting ready to sleep. I'm glad it works. It was my pleasure. Thank you for the pretty drawing of my face.

CLARKE

no problem. i had a pretty good starting point

CLARKE

i only wish i could see you blush right now

LEXA

I'm not blushing.

CLARKE

yeah, sure you're not

LEXA

I am not.

CLARKE

don't worry, it's super cute

CLARKE

and the way you look at me when you think i can't see you is also super cute

LEXA

I don't know what you're talking about.

CLARKE

i caught you looking 3 times and i'm pretty sure you were staring at my ass like half of the time

CLARKE

don't worry, that's also cute

LEXA

Well, you do have a great ass.

CLARKE

i know, right? one of my best qualities body-wise

LEXA

Your eyes are your best quality, body-wise.

CLARKE

why don't you look there then more often?

CLARKE

instead your eyes wander down low

LEXA

It's easier.

CLARKE

you are amazing.

LEXA

Thank you.

LEXA

:P

CLARKE

wow i got your tongue

LEXA

You wish.

LEXA

I wish I could see you blushing now.

CLARKE

i'm not blushing, just flustered, thinking about your tongue

CLARKE

i think i would very much enjoy it

LEXA

I think so too.

CLARKE

i should go to bed before i get even more inappropriate

CLARKE

we'll talk

CLARKE

goodnight lexa

LEXA

Goodnight Clarke

  
Lexa turned her phone off and went to bed smiling.

* * *

 

Next morning Lexa woke up around 9 but didn't leave the bed until 10. She spent good amount of that hour stalking Clarke on social media. Mostly Instagram. And it wasn't really stalking. She was just looking at her pictures. And there were a lot of them.

Pictures of Clarke in coats and bikinis and everything in between.

After a long and cold shower Lexa decided to go to the cafe down the street, that way she won't spend the day looking at Clarke in bikini. She packed her favorite book and went out.

The cafe was small and cozy. She recognized the man from the day before standing behind the counter. There were few more people inside. Two older guy were talking to the owner and a woman was sitting right next to the entrance. They all looked up she she entered.

\- Good morning young lady. - The owner smiled. - I'm happy you came.

\- Good morning. I had to try your decent coffee.

\- Well, you are in for a treat. Black?

\- Yes please.

Lexa sat in the far corner of the room, next to the big window.

\- Here you go, lady.

\- Thank you, and, please, it's Lexa.

\- Lexa. Nice to meet you. My name is Dave.

He put the coffee in front of her.

\- Enjoy your coffee Lexa, I'll leave you to it. If you need something you know where to find me.

\- Thank you.

Lexa took out her book and took a sip of the coffee before she started to read. It really was good.

After some time her bag started buzzing.

CLARKE

you busy?

LEXA

No. Reading. Laptop still working?

CLARKE

yes yes, still peachy. i wanted to ask you if you would wanna go drink coffee with me

CLARKE

i mean nothing other than coffee

CLARKE

bc you said you like that. or octavia did. i don't know. but i was just leaving, going out, so i wanted to ask you if you wanna sit somewhere with me while i draw

CLARKE

you can read

CLARKE

or stare

Lexa smiled.

LEXA

I'm at the coffee shop down the street. You can join me if you want. I don't mind.

CLARKE

great. i'll be right there

  
Lexa was starting to get nervous. She'll have Clarke in front of her. Again. Soon. But now she knew how Clarke looked in bikini. Nervous was an understatement.

CLARKE

did you eat anything?

Lexa was thinking about eating, but they probably didn't have the same thing on their minds.

LEXA

Ummm, no, not really.

CLARKE

i'll bring you something

LEXA

That's not necessary.

CLARKE

i know. but i will. you are welcome

LEXA

Thank you.

  
Clarke was making her nervous. Thighs clenching and bees buzzing nervous. She liked it but also didn't and Clarke was not making her life easier.

Not long after her last message she saw Clarke walking towards the caffe carrying two bags. She was wearing a skirt and a sweater. Lexa really liked Clarke's legs. She spent most of her time thinking about being between them.

\- Good morning. – Lexa heard Clarke's voice.

\- One black coffee, please. - She ordered before going to where Lexa was sitting.

\- Hello you.

\- Clarke.

\- So formal. – Clarke sat down and put the bad on her lap.

\- I got you a turkey sandwich. I didn't know what to get you so I played safe. I guess. Hope that's okay.

Lexa smiled.

\- It's more than okay. Thank you, you didn't have to but I'm glad you did because I'm kinda hungry.

\- Here you go miss, one black coffee for you.

\- Can I get one more?

\- Of course Lexa. All you can drink.

Clarke waited for Dave to be gone.

\- First name basis. Is there something you are not telling me, Lexa?

\- Very funny. I pass by him every day when I go to class. Yesterday he invited me to come and have coffee whenever I want.

\- And people say being polite doesn't pay off. Now eat.

\- Wow this is amazing, where did you get this? – Lexa asked between bites.

\- I made it.

\- You are staring. - Lexa said as she looked up.

\- I can't help it. I love watching you eat.

Lexa blushed.

\- C'mon now, that was just too easy. - Clarke said with a grin on her face.

\- Why are you not eating? - Lexa tried to steer the conversation to something else.

\- I already ate. I'm not hungry.

\- Too bad.

\- Don't worry, I can be hungry for you.

By the time Lexa realized what Clarke said, her cheeks were more red than the ketchup in her sandwich. She ate it quickly and without speaking. When she was done she looked up and saw Clarke staring. Again.

\- Do I have something on my face?

\- No, you are just very beautiful. – Clarke said with a smile.

\- Thank you.

Clarke took her notebook from the bag.

\- Go on, read you book, I was serious when I said we would just hang out.

Lexa went back to her book, thinking about everything other than the words she read. Next time she looked up she caught Clarke staring but decided to ignore it and look at her phone instead. 3 pm and a message.

OCTAVIA

girl did u hit that booty?

OCTAVIA

are you still hitting it?

LEXA

I did not. I am not and I don't know what you are talking about.

OCTAVIA

you are alive!!!! and i'm talking about the booty.

LEXA

I didn't do anything.

OCTAVIA

too bad. did you see her? laptop and such?

LEXA

I was at her place last night and fixed it. Now we are at that cafe.

OCTAVIA

YOU WERE AT HER PLACE???? AND YOU ARE WITH HER NOW???

LEXA

She lives in the building next to mine and yes. She offered to hang out and I was already here so I invited her and now we are here.

OCTAVIA

how does she look?

LEXA

Hot.

OCTAVIA

i knew it. you are fucked

OCTAVIA

she's so your type

LEXA

Nothing will happen. We are just hanging out.

OCTAVIA

mhmmm

LEXA

I gotta go, I'm being rude.

OCTAVIA

go lexa. hit that booty.

LEXA

Bye Octavia.

  
When she put her phone down, Lexa realized Clarke stopped drawing and was looking at her.

\- That was some furious typing.

\- Yeah, it's Octavia. She's being silly. Doing Octavia stuff. What are you drawing?

-You.

Clarke turned the notebook to Lexa and once again she was looking at her own face.

\- You make me prettier than I am. It's really good.

\- I try to make you just the way you are.

There she was again. With a pretty girl, girl who in her free time draws Lexa's face. She might as well say what was on her mind.

\- You are pretty. – Lexa said.

\-  I know. Also super hot.

\- Super, super hot.

Clarke laughed and Lexa couldn't do much but laugh herself.

\- Wanna go to my place? We can watch movies?

It was sudden and unexpected and the only possible outcome.

\- I promise I won't bite. Unless you want me too.

It was an invitation and a promise.

\- Movie sounds good.

And movie was the last thing on both of their minds.

\- Great. Off we go. Or did you want to stay more?

\- No, I'm good. Let's go.

Clarke's apartment looked the same and smelled the same. Like Clarke.

\- You want something to drink? Eat?

Lexa wanted someone, not something.

\- No, I'm good, thank you.

\- So, what do you wanna watch?

\- I don't know. Whatever you want.

Half way through the second Meg Ryan movie Lexa eased into Clarke. The other girl had her head on Lexa's shoulder for the bigger part of the movie.

Clarke smelled like flowers.

Lexa took a deep breath and Clarke looked up. Her eyes were sparkly and she smiled.

Lexa knew what was coming and she still wasn't prepared. How could she be.

Clarke kissed her. It was soft and shy and short. But as soon as that first kiss was over, Clarke hungrily took Lexa's upper lip into her mouth and Lexa couldn't help but moan. Next second she had Clarke on her lap and Clarke's hands under her shirt.

Clarke tasted like coffee and rain.

\- We should slow down. – Lexa broke their kiss making Clarke groan.

She continued to place kisses on Lexa's jaw, leaving a burning trail behind.

\- Why? – Clarke asked between kisses. Her mouth was now on Lexa's neck, marking it as hers. Lexa digged her nails into Clarke's thighs. She was burning and she wanted more. – You seem to like it.

They kissed again. It was messy and rough and Clarke wanted more.

\- I like it a lot. But...

Clarke cut her off with another kiss and Lexa lost every and any ounce of resistance she had. She grabbed Clarke's ass and pulled her closer. The throb between her legs was becoming insufferable and she needed Clarke closer.

Clarke took off her shirt and Lexa kissed every inch of Clarke's skin she could see. She reached to unclasp Clarke's bra.

\- Can I? – Lexa asked before pulling Clarke's lower lip in her mouth.

Clarke nodded.  Lexa had braless Clarke in her lap and she couldn't look away.

\- Like what you see?

\- Very much.

Lexa put both of her hands on Clarke's breasts, squeezing them lightly before flicking her thumb over the hard nipples.

\- Fuck. – Clarke moaned.

Her hands fumbled with Lexa's jeans, trying and failing to unbutton them. She let out a desperate huff and Lexa laughed. She took Clarke's hands and put them around her neck.

\- Steady. There's time.

Clarke leaned her forehead on Lexa's, slowly rolling her hips against Lexa's.

\- I am so wet – Clarke whispered.  – You wanna feel it?

Before Lexa could say anything Clarke took her hand and lead it between their bodies and between her legs.

Lexa stopped breathing and Clarke's head fell into her neck at the touch.

\- So wet.– Lexa whispered in Clarke's ear as she started to slowly move her fingers over the fabric of already ruined panties. The sounds leaving Clarke's mouth were everything she ever wanted to hear.

\- Touch me. Please. – Clarke pleaded and Lexa obliged.

They were far behind the point of no return.

Lexa pulled Clarke's panties to the side and lightly pressed her thumb on Clarke's clit. She was losing all control she had over her body. Clarke was soft and wet. And she wanted her.

\- Bed. We need bed. – Lexa said and took out her hand. Clarke groaned at the loss of contact.

\- Then go.

Lexa got up, carrying the girl whose legs were around her waist. She pushed her against the bedroom door.

\- Sexy. – Clarke said before opening.

Lexa laid Clarke on the bed, hovering over her.

\- You are so beautiful.

\- And you have too many clothes on.

\- Take them off then.

Clarke didn't wait for Lexa to finish her sentence. She took off piece by piece until Lexa was left with nothing on but her panties.

Lexa pushed her back to the bed and started to kiss down her body.

\- Fuck. You are good with your tongue.

\- You haven't seen anything yet.

Clarke groaned and grinded against Lexa's leg, leaving a wet trail on her thigh.

Lexa wanted to taste her and she was done waiting. Almost.

She kneeled and took off Clarke's skirt and panties. The sight of naked Clarke with her legs spread made her head dizzy. She settled between Clarke's legs, leaving bruises on her thighs. All she wanted to do is dip her tongue in Clarke. Taste her.

\- Don't tease. Please.

Lexa moved her head just a little off of where Clarke wanted her. But then Clarke lifted her hips and Lexa finally got to taste her.

\- Fuck me.

Lexa looked up and grinned.

\- Eager.

\- Just shut up and fuck me.

Lexa's tongue found Clarke's clit and she shuddered at the contact. She moved her tongue through Clarke's folds enjoying the sounds coming from her.

\- Fuck. Don't stop. More. Please.

Lexa put fingers inside her speeding her thrusts while her tongue never left Clarke's clit.

\- I'm gonna come.

She felt Clarke tightening around her fingers. She wanted more and it was going to be a long night.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are still going good for Lexa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on tumblr @ordinarklo

When Lexa opened her eyes she could see the sun was already shining outside. She reached for her phone to see what time it was. 6.45 am.

\- Fuck, fuck, fuck. – she muttered.

She looked to her right and saw Clarke sleeping peacfully. She wanted to kiss her but didn't want to wake her up so she did the next best thing.

After finding her clothes, Lexa placed a soft kiss on Clarke's cheek and snapped a photo. On Clarke's desk she found a piece of paper and a pen. She wrote a note:

**I'm sorry I left but you were sleeping and I didn't  want to wake you up.**

**Lexa**

 

When she got back to her apartment she brushed her teeth and took a quick shower. It was already past 7 am and she was late, again and she knew Octavia would kill her. She put on some clean clothes and rushed out.

Dave's caffe was already open and he was inside. She hurried trying to not be as late as she knew was going to be.

OCTAVIA

you are late. again

OCTAVIA

wtf is going on

OCTAVIA

are you dead?

LEXA

Be there in 5. I'm sorry.

 

\- What the fuck happened? You are 15 minutes late. What the fuck Lexa?

\- I'm sorry, I overslept and it's only 10 minutes.

\- Only 10 minutes? You've never in your life been this late to anything ever.

\- I'm sorry you had to wait. Can we go eat now? I'm starving.

\- Yes we can. But how did you sleep in? I thought you had a system that works and shit.

\- The system failed.

\- Why?

\- Because I forgot to turn on my alarm.

They entered the bakery, ordered their food and sat in the corner.

\- You forgot? You're kidding me right? Next thing you'll tell me is that you didn't sleep in your bed.

Lexa stayed quite and looked down at her food, small smile dancing on her lips.

\- Oh. My. God. You fucked her. – Octavia blurted out.

Everyone around them went silent and looked at them.

\- Shhhh and I did not.

\- Oh yes you did. You fucked her and slept at her place. Damn. Good job. I thought she was way out of your league.

\- Thanks. So nice of you.

\- I mean it's not like you are bad or something, she is just very super hot. But you did it. Good job.

\- Can we not talk about it.

\- Hmmmm how about no. How did it happen?

Lexa looked around to see if anyone was still looking in their direction but they all seemed to have forgotten about them.

\- We had coffee, she invited me over, we watched a movie, I kissed her, then we fucked. Multiple times.

\- You devil.

Lexa tried to hide her grin.

\- What are you gonna do now?

\- I don't know.

\- She is super hot and super smart. And you are all smiley.

\- I know and I'm not.

\- Yes you are, orgasms suit you.

\- Oh my God.

Her phone buzzed.

\- Oh. Tell me you didn't leave while she was sleeping?

\- I had to. I was already late. I left her a note.

\- Why didn't you wake her up?

\- Because she was sleeping.

\- You are already so deep you don't even know it. Reply her silly.

 

CLARKE

sneaking like a thief

LEXA

You were sleeping. I didn't want to wake you up. I'm sorry I left.

CLARKE

it's okay. i wanted a kiss

 

Lexa giggled. She felt like a teenager again. She couldn't help herself and she didn't mind. It felt good. More than good. It felt amazing.

\- What is she saying?

\- She says she wanted a good morning kiss.

\- You are whipped as a whipped cream.

\- I'm not.

\- Why are you smiling then?

Lexa hesitated. She knew Octavia would tease her till the end of days if she told her what she did. But she was happy and excited and she didn't care. She wanted to scream so everyone knew.

\- I kinda kissed her and took a photo.

\- Wow. I can't even tease you about that.

Lexa found a picture she took earlier that morning and sent it to Clarke.

LEXA

[photo]

I kinda did kiss you :p

CLARKE

.................................................

CLARKE

do you realize how cute you are?

LEXA

I'm not, I'm just prepared

CLARKE

yes you are. the cutest ever.

CLARKE

i want more kisses

LEXA

Sucks to be you.

:p

CLARKE

rude

CLARKE

i have to go get ready.

LEXA

Okay, be good.

LEXA

Octavia says hi.

CLARKE

right back at her . see you later.

LEXA

Bye bye

 

\- She said hi.

\- I can't wait for you to have babies.

\- Oh God, calm down, please.

\- Yeah, sure, I will... never.

\- I have to go to my class. See you at 1?

\- You bet your sweet ass you'll see me.

They hugged and went their separate ways.

* * *

 

Little after 11 Clarke sent her a message.

 

CLARKE

you busy?

LEXA

I have a 15 minute break. Why?

CLARKE

i'm trying to draw but i can't stop thinking about your head between my legs

 

Lexa felt the heat building up between her own legs.

 

LEXA

Where are you?

CLARKE

library

LEXA

Meet me in the bathroom in 2 minutes.

 

She was really going to do it. She will fuck someone in the bathroom of her university. If someone told her that a week ago she'd call them crazy. But at that moment she didn't care. All she wanted to do was kiss Clarke and feel Clarke and be with Clarke.

When she got to the bathroom Clarke was already there.

\- Hey. – Clarke said when she saw her.

Lexa didn't waste any time as she started to kiss Clarke. She pushed her against the door and unziped her pants.

\- Fuck. – Clarke whispered.

She grabed Lexa's hips and pulled her closerright before Lexa pulled down her pants.

\- Are you always this wet?

\- Mmm only when I think about you.

\- Good girl.

Clarke moaned, loud, before Lexa kissed her again. She put her left hand on Clarke's hip, holding her against the door and the other between her legs, rubbing her clit with just enough pressure.

\- Are you trying to fuck me or drive me insane? – Clarke asked pushing her hips closer to Lexa's hand.

\- Both. – Lexa said smiling.

She moved her mouth to Clarke's neck and sucked hard on the blonde's pulse point, her fingers bringing Clarke to the edge.

\- Fuck.

\- Do you want to come? - Lexa whispered to Clarke's ear, her voice low and husky, sending shivers down Clarke's body.

\- Please.

\- Then come for me baby.

Clarke could feel her entire body collapsing. If it wasn't for Lexa's hand holding her she would have fallen to the floor.

\- Fuck, that was so good. – she said once down from her high.

\- You okay?

Clarke laughed and then kissed Lexa.

\- More than.

\- Legs okay?

Clarke couldn't miss the smirk on the other girl's face.

\- Yeah, my legs are okay, thanks.

Lexa pulled back up Clarke's pants.

\- I wanna do you. - Clarke whispered as she bit Lexa's earlobe.

\- Fuck. I want that too but I have to go back for my class.

\- When are you free? – Clarke asked between kisses she placed on Lexa's jaw.

\- After lunch.

\- I have class from 1.30 to 5.

\- What the fuck? What kind of class is that?

Clarke laughed.

\- A long one. Can I see you after that?

\- Yes. I'll be home.

\- Good.

They kissed one last time. Clarke went back to library and Lexa to her class.

 

At her next break Lexa checked her phone.

OCTAVIA

your girlfriend will join us for lunch

LEXA

She is not my girlfriend.

OCTAVIA

yeah loser, whatever

 

Next one was from Clarke.

 

CLARKE

how's the class going?

LEXA

Strugling.

CLARKE

does this help

 

It was a picture. Clarke's cleavage.

 

LEXA

Fuck.

CLARKE

can't wait for that

CLARKE

go pay atention to your class

LEXA

You'll pay for this.

CLARKE

i'm counting on it

* * *

 

It was 1 and Lexa was walking towards Octavia and Clarke for lunch. She could see them sitting on of the benches.

\- Hello weirdo.

\- Hey Lexa. - Clarke said grinning.

\- Hi.

\- Soooo you are still formal? How is that possible? You've seen each other naked, you gotta have nicknames.

Lexa sat down and took out her lunch, ignoring Octavia.

\- I guess you didn't have time to make lunch. - Octavia was fucking with her and Clarke was laughing. - You were busy eating something else.

Clarke almost spit out her drink and Lexa almost choked on her food.

\- Oh my God. I love you so much. - Clarke said.

\- And I hate you. - Lexa added.

\- I like your work, good job. - Octavia said pointing to the giant hickey on Clarke's neck.

Lexa spent the rest of the lunch trying not to stare too much at Clarke. They shared fractions of glances but they were always smiling to each other.

Little before 1.30 Clarke got up and had to leave.

\- Ah I gotta leave you ladies now. - She hugged Octavia and winked at Lexa. - I'll text you later.

\- You are so fucked. – Octavia said after Clarke left.

\- I'm not.

\- Yeah you are, literally and also in every other way.

\- I don't know her, we are only having fun.

\- Yeah I can see what kind of fun. And I don't mean the sexy times fun. Real fun.

\- You are exaggerating.

\- I'm not. When was the last time you hanged out with someone who wasn't me or without me or just sat in silence with someone other than me?

\- That means nothing.

\- C'mon Lexa, we are not children, don't act like one.

\- It's so easy to just be with her. She knows so much and she's so smart and good at everything she does. She brought me a sandwich yesterday. She made it. She draws me. And she smells really nice and she is very beautiful and so hot. God, she is so hot. Fuck. I am fucked.

Octavia smiled and put her hand on Lexa's shoulder.

\- That's good. Listen to your advice and just enjoy it. Have fun. Don't think about it and just live it. No matter what it is. Don't obsess with naming it. Just be with her and smile. It suits you.

\- Yeah but I can't...

Octavia cut her off.

\- I understand but don't think about that stuff. Just let her make you smile. And scream.

\- I don't scream.

\- I bet she does.

\- You wouldn't be wrong.

* * *

 

When Lexa got home she jumped into the shower. Octavia was right. She couldn't get the stupid grin off of her face and it was all because of Clarke. She decided to listen to her own advice and just enjoy whatever happens.

At 4.45 pm she got a text.

CLARKE

done. are you home?

LEXA

Yep. Third floor, number 10.

CLARKE

i'm running......

LEXA

Hahaha take your time, I'm not going anywhere.

CLARKE

you bet your sweet ass you are not

LEXA

Be careful and hurry up or I'll start without you.

CLARKE

rude. also hot.

LEXA

I'm waiting.

CLARKE

be there soon.

 

When she heard someone knock on her door she almost ran to open it. She took a moment to get her shit together and then opened with a smile. Clarke almost jumped on her grabbing her face and kissing her.

 - Hello to you too. – Lexa managed to say.

 

Many hous later they were lying naked in bed, Clarke had her back pressed to Lexa's front and Lexa had her arms wrapped around the blonde and was lightly touching her hand and softly kissing her shoulder.

\- Mmmm. -quiet moan escaped Clarke's mouth. Lexa smiled. - I can feel you smiling.

\- You are cute.

\- I'm hungry. For food. Before you think of saying anything. – Clarke said as she turned around to face Lexa. Her hair was messy and her eyes sparkly and Lexa couldn't help but smile. - What?

\- You are pretty.

Clarke blushed.

\- I wouldn't mind spending the rest of the year like this you know. In your arms with you kissing me and looking at me like that.

\- And how am I looking at you?

Clarke didn't say aynthing.

\- I. Am. Hungry. - She said instead, kissing Lexa between every word.

\- What do you want to eat?

\- What do you have?

\- What do you want?

\- What do you have?

\- What are you, 10?

\- Yes. - Clarke grinned and Lexa shook her head.

\- Pasta okay?

\- You gonna cook for me?

\- Yes. Do you like pasta?

\- Love it.

\- Okay, then you have to move.

\- Mmmm noooo, don't leave.

\- If you want food then you have to move.

\- I know, but I don't want tooooo.

\- What about this? I go cook and you take a shower.

\- Oh is that so. You trying to tell me something?

\- Yes. If we don't get out of this bed now we won't leave it for a long time and I'm also hungry and we need to eat.

\- You are beyond cute. But yes, I am going. You have some clothes for me?

\- Shirts are in top drawer, sweaters in second and shorts in the last one. You have clean towels in the bathroom.

* * *

 

After she prepared everything and the food was cooking, Lexa checked her phone.

OCTAVIA

are you hitting it?

OCTAVIA

i'm sure you are

OCTAVIA

proud of you

OCTAVIA

text me on your break

LEXA

You are crazy.

OCTAVIA

damn that was long.

LEXA

A lot of catching up to do.

OCTAVIA

damn

OCTAVIA

good job

LEXA

Thanks

 

She looked up and saw Clarke in her shirt and shorts, with wet hair and smile on her face.

\- You look great.

Clarke walked up to her and kissed her.

\- So do you. Octavia bothering you?

\- Yeah, she says good job.

\- She's right, you did a good job. Probably not what she meant but nevertheless.

 

They spent the rest of the week doing what they did that day. Mornings at university and nights at Lexa's apartment. It was Friday at 6 pm, Lexa and Clarke were in Lexa's bed, cuddling. Lexa's phone buzzed a couple of times.

\- Don't answer that. - Clarke whispered into her neck.

\- It's a text. Probably Octavia. - She reached for her phone and read the messages.

 

OCTAVIA

you do know we are going out today?

OCTAVIA

don't give me same gay excuse

OCTAVIA

you've been fucking her all week

OCTAVIA

you can go out with me tonight

 

\- Ugghhh. We are supposed to go out tonight.

\- Today is that friday hmm?

\- Yeah but I don't wanna.

\- Awww you should hang out.

\- You wanna come?

\- No, that's your thing, I'll catch up with my drawing. We can see each other when you get home.

 

LEXA

I know. 9?

OCTAVIA

yes. i'll pick you up.

OCTAVIA

say hi to your girlfriend

LEXA

Not my girlfriend.

OCTAVIA

whatever loser. cya

 

\- She says hi.

\- Did she tell you to say hi to your girlfriend?

\- Maybe.

Lexa didn't know what else to say. Or what Clarke was thinking. They never really talked about it. It being their relationship. She didn't know what Clarke wanted but she knew what she wanted.

\- When are you going? – Clarke asked after a couple of minutes.

\- 9.

\- Okay, so I have more time. - she said and hugged Lexa tighter.

\- Koala.

\- That's me.

After a half of hour of kissing and cuddling Lexa had to leave the bed.

\- I have to go get ready.

\- I know.

\- Will you stay here or go home?

\- What would you like more?

\- It would be nice if you were here when I got back.

\- Then I'll be here. – Clarke smiled.

\- But you said you have to catch up on your drawings. You can go home, don't stay because of me.

\- I'll bring everything I need here, if that's okay.

\- More than.

Lexa kissed her. It was soft and gentle and deep and made Clarke loose her breath.

\- You smell like flowers. - Lexa said resting her forehead on Clarke's.

\- You smell like sex.

Lexa laughed.

\- Thanks.

\- You should go shower.

\- What if I want to smell you on me all night?

\- Octavia will tell you you are pussy whipped.

\- She won't be wrong.

\- True.

\- But yeah, I'll go shower.

\- And I'll go get my things.

 

When Clarke got back from her apartment Lexa was already dressed.

\- Hot.

\- I know.

Clarke kissed her and grabbed her ass pushing her to the wall.

\- As much as I like where this is going, Octavia will be here soon and she'll kill you if she walks on us.

\- Ah, then no orgasms for you.

\- Sadsies.

They were interuppted by the knocking on the door.

Lexa kissed Clarke one last time before leaving.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get mediocre but then good again for Lexa.

Around 3 am Lexa manages to open the door of her apartment. She is drunk. Very drunk so she goes to get a glass of water and almost breaks everything in the cupboard.

\- Shit. 

\- Hey drunkie.

\- Sorry I thought you were sleeping.

Lexa tries to walk to Clarke but the room is spinning, she trips and just laughs.

\- Wow okay, I'll help you to bed.

\- Mmmmm yes bed please. – she says as she tries to pull Clarke into a hug.

\- Lexa you wouldn't be able to find my ass let alone have sex.

\- I know where your ass is. It's a great ass. – Lexa says as she slaps Clarke's ass.

\- I know, thanks baby. But let's go get you to bed.

Clarke helps her get to the bed but Lexa is not playing along. She sits on bed and takes off her shoes. Clarke tries to take her shirt off but Lexa doesn't want.

\- C'mon you have to change.

\- No. - Lexa pouts.

\- Why not?

Clarke is trying not to laugh. She never thought drunk Lexa would be so cute.

\- I want one that smells like you.

\- Here, this one smells like me. – Clarke hands her the one she was wearing earlier that day.

Lexa smells is and smiles.

\- Yes it does.

She puts on the shirt Clarke just gave her and takes off her pants.

\- I like it more when you undress me.

\- I like it too. – Clarke kisses her forehead. - Do you want to drink something?

\- No.

\- You wanna sleep?

\- No.

\- What do you want?

\- Cuddle . – Lexa answers grinning.

Just when Clarke was ready to get in bed next to Lexa her phone starts ringing.

\- Someone is calling you.

\- It's a text message.

\- Look at it.

\- I will later.

\- Look at it now.

Not only was drunk Lexa cute she was also very persistant.

Text was from Octavia.

 

OCTAVIA

hey, i'm sorry if you are sleeping but are you at Lexa's?

CLARKE

yes, she came a little while ago. she's pretty drunk.

OCTAVIA

i'm sorryyyyy i'll come over if you don't want to deal with it now

CLARKE

it's okay. i'll manage

OCTAVIA

don't let her say stupid stuff

 

\- Your lover.

\- What? – Clarke looks at her confused. Drunk Lexa also apparently said stuff that made no sense.

\- Is it your lover?

\- My lover is drunk in front of me.

\- Cuddles. – Lexa says as she pulls Clarke's hand.

\- Mmmmm. I really like you. – Lexa murmurs.

\- I really like you too.

\- Like so much. I've never liked someone this much. Only Costia maybe.

Lexa is drunk, mumbling and oversharing. Clarke kisses her neck.

\- Who is Costia?

\- No one important.

\- I like you too, so so much.

\- Why?

\- Why do I like you?

\- Yes, why?

\- Because you are smart and funny and beautiful and you make me feel good. Why do you like me?

\- Boobs.

Clarke can't help but laugh.

\- You like me because of my boobs.

\- Mmmm yes they are so soft and nice.

\- Cool, I'm glad. – she kisses Lexa's shoulder.

\- I also like your eyes and your smile and your nose and your hair and your ass and your arms and hands and stomach and legs and ass and brain and when you call me Lexa.

\- Wow, that's a lot of stuff.

\- There's a lot of you. And I like it all.

\- I like all of you. Now sleep.

They fall asleep curled up together with smiles on their faces.

* * *

 

Lexa wakes up with a killer headache. She looks at her phone. 8 am. It's early and she is hungover. She turns and sees Clarke sleeping next to her before getting up and going to the bathroom. She feels a bit better after brushing her teeth and taking a long cold shower so she goes to kitchen to make some coffee.

After a couple of minutes she sees Clarke walking into kitchen.

\- Good morning. – Clarke smiles. – How's your head?

\- Good morning. - Lexa responds. - Hurts but it will be okay.  I'm sorry about last night.

\- Why? – Clarke smiles. – You were extremely cute.

\- Ugh, it was terrible.

Clarke walks up to her and plants a kiss on her cheek.

\- It was alright, don't worry. You didn't say anything wrong if that's what's bothering you. You just went on and on how much you like me.

\- Oh God.

Clarke laughs.

\- But I like you too so no worries.

* * *

 

They spend the weekend tangled in Lexa's bed, cuddling, kissing, fucking, enjoying the silence.

\- I never asked you, and it doesn't matter, but just like so I know, are you gay or bi or something else?

Question takes Clarke by surprise. She turns around to face Lexa and kisses her nose.

\- I can do both but I prefer girls.

\- When did you know you liked both?

\- My teens I think. I didn't go the usual boys then girls route. My first crush and then relationship was a girl, and for the longest time I thougth I was gay but I then realized that I like guys too so yeah.

\- Your parents were okay with it?

\- Yeah, they are great.

Clarke watches Lexa's eyes while playing with her hand. She won't ask and Lexa appreciates.

\- I never was attracted to guys. Thank fuck. It was always girls. I don't know if I was in love but I came close to it once. Had other shit to think about. I think you can't love other person until you love yourself and it took me a long time to understand who I am, not in the deep way but just accept that I'm like this and that I won't change. And my parents didn't help. But I survived.

\- And you came out great. No pun intended. But I'm sorry you had to go through bad times. Is it better now? With your parents I mean.

\- Not really, we don't talk about it.

\- Can I ask you something?

\- Yeah, of course.

\- How many realtionships were you in?

\- Hmmm I don't know, not much if you mean like real realtionship. I don't think I ever had one.

They are silent for a few moments before Lexa speaks.

\- I can hear you thinking, what's going on?

Clarke stops drawing circles on Lexa's hand and looks up at her.

\- It's just you mentioned someone this friday and I thought it was someone important.

 A hundred and one alarm goes off in Lexa's head.

\- Who did I mention?

\- Costia.

\- That... was a long time ago.

\- Okay.

It's small and sad and it breaks Lexa's heart. But she says nothing, she can't talk about Costia. Clarke turns around and says nothing more.

After a while Lexa hears Clarke's breathing evening out. She's asleep. She turns around and grabs her phone.

LEXA

Are you sleeping?

 

After a couple of minutes she gets a reply.

OCTAVIA

nope. what's up?

LEXA

I did a stupid thing.

OCTAVIA

what?

LEXA

I drunk mentioned Costia.

OCTAVIA

what? why? how?

LEXA

I don't know. I was drunk.

OCTAVIA

what did you tell her?

LEXA

Nothing. That it was a long time ago and she said okay.

OCTAVIA

..... okay that was a jerk move

LEXA

I don't know what I said on Friday.

OCTAVIA

ask her

LEXA

What if I told her I don't like her as much as Costia

OCTAVIA

i don't know.

OCTAVIA

do you?

LEXA

I don't know.

LEXA

She's different. Better. But I don't know. I think I fucked up because before she mentioned her I sad I never was really in love, except maybe once.

OCTAVIA

dear lord Lexa. you need to talk to her

LEXA

I can't talk about that with her.

OCTAVIA

yeah you can and you have to

LEXA

What if I hurt her?

OCTAVIA

then you hurt her but at least she'll know stuff and not guess and think god knows what

OCTAVIA

just tell her

LEXA

Okay. I will.

OCTAVIA

good. now go sleep. i'll see you tomorrow. good night.

LEXA

Night.

* * *

 

Lexa turns off her alarm before it even rings. It's 5 am and she didn't sleep at all last night. She leaves Clarke sleeping in her bed and goes to make coffee. She spent the whole night thinking about what Octavia told her, how she needs to tell Clarke about Costia. Costia was a lifetime ago. Costia was everything Lexa had until she didn't have her. She was the first and only person Lexa has ever loved. Up until now.

She doesn't hear when Clarke walks in.

\- What time is it?

\- Hey. 5.30. - Lexa tries to smile.

\- Why the fuck are you up at this time?

\- I couldn't sleep. You?

\- The bed was cold.

\- I'm sorry.

\- It's okay. You mind if I sit with you?

\- Of course not.

Clarke sits beside her and puts her head on the other girls shoulder.

\- Costia was my girlfriend.

\- You don't have to talk about it.

\- I kinda do. I don't know what I said last Friday but yeah she was my girlfriend. We were friends, we hung out, spent a lot of time together. She was my first kiss,  my first broken heart, a lot of firsts. I didn't have a great time growing up. She helped. She was sweet and soft and gentle and she took care of me, never asking for anything. She understood when I was sad but she was also just a kid so she didn't understand always and there were times when it was all too much for her. And then my parents found out and sent me to the other side of the state. She was mad and angry and blamed me for not staying or trying to stay. - Lexa just blurts word after word not thinking about what they are.

It leaves Clarke speechless. She just sits there, with her head on Lexa's shoulder, not knowing what to say or how to say what she wants. She takes Lexa's hand and kisses it.

\- I'm sorry.

\- It's okay.

\- I really do like you, you know.

\- I like you too.

They sit like that for a couple more minutes when Lexa speaks again.

\- I have to go get ready. Breakfast with Octavia.

\- I know.

\- Okay.

Lexa gets up and goes to shower. When she's out, Clarke is no longer in her apartment. She looks at her phone and sees a text.

CLARKE

i'm not feeling good. i went home.

LEXA

Do you need something?

CLARKE

it's okay. i'll text you later.

LEXA

Okay.

* * *

 

It's a first day in over a week that she's on time.

\- You look not good.

\- Thanks.

\- What happened?

\- I didn't sleep much last night.

\- Did you talk with her?

\- Yeah, I told her more or less everything, the short story.

\- And?

\- And she said she's sorry and then went away after i went to take a shower.

\- What? Where did she go?

\- Home. She texted me that she's not feeling good. She's very cold. Since last night. I fucked up.

\- You didn't.

\- We'll see.

They sit in silence, Octavia doesn't know what to say so she says nothing. It's first time since they became friends that she doesn't know how to help Lexa.

\- When is your class? – Octavia asks.

\- 9, but I think I'll go home. I don't feel so well.

\- You need me to go with you?

\- No, I'm okay. I'll text you later.

\- Okay. Take care. And don't worry. It will be okay.

\- Yeah.

They hug and Lexa goes home.

* * *

 

She sleeps.

And then sleeps some more.

When Lexa looks at her phone, many hours later, she sees messages and notifications of all kind.

 

OCTAVIA

are you okay?

OCTAVIA

are you home?

OCTAVIA

i hope you are sleeping

OCTAVIA

i'll kill you if you are ignoring me

OCTAVIA

it's been 6 hours

OCTAVIA

where the fuck are you

LEXA

I was sleeping. Sorry

 

Next there's Clarke.

 

CLARKE

how are you?

CLARKE

Octavia told me you are not feeling well

CLARKE

i hope you are okay

CLARKE

i'm sorry if you don't wanna talk to me

CLARKE

i'm just worried

LEXA

I was sleeping. I'm sorry if I scared you.

LEXA

And of course I want to talk to you.

CLARKE

are you okay?

LEXA

I will be.

LEXA

You?

CLARKE

i'm okay.

LEXA

Are you home?

CLARKE

no

 

Lexa starts and then deletes multiple messages.

 

LEXA

Are you mad at me?

CLARKE

no, ofc not, why would i be

LEXA

Is that a question or?

CLARKE

why do you think i'm mad?

LEXA

You left.

CLARKE

that was a lot to process

CLARKE

can i come over?

 

Lexa types no but then deletes it.

LEXA

Yes.

 

After a couple of minutes, Lexa hears someone knocking on her door.

\- Hey. – Clarke says.

\- Hi. – Lexa responds and steps back to let Clarke in.

They move to kitchen and lean on opposite counters, facing each other.

\- I'm sorry I reacted like that. It was stupid, but I panicked.

\- Don't worry, it's okay.

\- What did I say last Friday? About Costia I mean. – Lexa asks, silence too much for her to bear.

Clarke still looks sad and defeated.

\- You said you think you like me as much as you like her.

\- I like you more.

\- Don't say stuff you don't mean. I'm not a child. I said it was okay. Just don't lie.

Now Lexa is the one looking down, sad.

\- I have some questions. You don't have to answer them. I'll understand why. – Clarke moves closer.

\- I'll answer them.

\- Have you seen her after that?

Lexa hesitates.

\- Yes. Couple of times.

\- What happened?

Lexa knows what Clarke wants to know.

\- We had coffee.

\- When was the last time?

\- Six months ago.

\- Why?

\- Why what?

\- Why do you still see her.

\- It's complicated.

\- Then explain it to me.

\- We had something special. Now we live different lives but... I don't know how to explain it. It was just coffee.

\- Just coffee. – Clarke repeates her words. She sounds annoyed and angry.

\- Clarke. She'll always be a part of me, I guess that's why.

\- Do you love her?

\- No. – Lexa is fast to answer.

\- How do you know?

\- Because, in the morning, when I wake up, I don't have the need to be with her. I used to but not anymore.

\- Where does she live?

\- Washington DC.

\- That's close.

\- Yes.

\- Why are you not together then?

\- I told you Clarke. We don't love each other anymore.

\- How do you know she doesn't love you?

\- I asked.

Minutes pass and they don't say anything when Clarke speaks again.

\- I have a problem.

\- What's wrong?

\- I really like you.

\- Why is that a problem? – Lexa is confused.

\- Because I'm falling in love with you.

\- Clarke, I...

\- Yeah, I know. I remember. It's fun and not serious.

\- I wasn't going to say that. I really like being with you. Really, really, really. But history repeats itself and...

\- And I am not her.

\- I know, but I'm still me.

\- Yes, Lexa, and you are amazing.  And I'm not her.

Lexa sighs and looks the girl in front of her. A girl with blonde hair and warm, blue eyes, with a smile on her face, a girl offering her heart.

\- You are much better. – Lexa says eventually and Clarke smiles wider.

They kiss.

For Lexa it's like the first one, the new one and the forever one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I never know how to end things, that's why that other fic is still going.
> 
> Sorry for any and all mistakes, I was half asleep writing this.  
> Find me on tumblr @ordinarklo.
> 
> If anyone has anything for me to write about hit me up.

**Author's Note:**

> I own nothing but mistakes belong to me.


End file.
